goodbye
by Red-and-Rea
Summary: This goes with 'Once Again'. It's just Bella saying goodbye to Jacob before she goesback to England.


I knew this day was going to come. I knew how Jacob felt about me, what he wished we could be. I knew that I never discouraged his plans, nor did I encourage them. I acted as if I didn't know about them. This was going to be the hardest goodbye, almost as hard as saying goodbye to Harry. I knew I had to do it with all the wolves there, or I'd never get to speak with Jacob. There'd be no use in asking to speak to Jacob privately; their extra hearing would pick up on it anyway.

I Apparated to Emily's front yard; where the smell of home baking greeted me. Laughter that rang through the house stopped abruptly as I knocked on the door. I heard a few whispers, and a sharp 'No!' from Jacob.

The door opened and Sam stood there, gaping at me.

I knew the reason for the gaping; I had removed all my glamour charms, so my hair was back to its vibrant red, and my eyes melted down to hazel.

'May I come in please?'

'Why?' the way Sam asked, sounded like an order instead of a request. So I responded in kind.

'I know you're the Alpha, Sam, but that's no way to speak to me, I'm not even in your pack!'

I pushed past Sam and entered to living room.

'What did you tell her, Jacob?'

'Jacob didn't tell me anything.' I said, before Jacob put his foot in his mouth. 'I knew you were wolves when Jacob told me the 'bear story'.' Over in the kitchen, I heard Emily talking on the phone in a quiet whisper.

'Leave now, before we call your father.' I couldn't stop the laugh that escaped my lips at Sam's order.

'I actually came here to talk to you about that, you see, I thought I should tell you that I'm leaving.'

Silence greeted my words, even Emily had hung up in order to listen to me.

Emily came into the kitchen then, looked at me with a discerning eye and said, in a soft tone: 'I thought you might do that – that's why I was against keeping the secret from you – I thought that one more lost friend would push you over the edge.'

I raised my eyebrows at her before I continued. 'I was already planning to leave, but you stopped me.'

'I did? How?' Jacob was so cute when he was confused, Merlin! Where did that come from?

'You gave me a project. The bikes.'

Just then, the front door opened, and Billy, the Clearwater family, and Quil Ateara Snr. walked in.

Billy was the first to speak. 'You're one of _them_, aren't you?'

The question confused me.

'One of _them_?'

Billy glanced at the wolves before answering. 'You know, like Sirius.'

'You knew Sirius?' I knew my mouth was hanging open, but I didn't care.

'We're related... somehow.'

'I should've known; the Blacks are a _big_ family.' I muttered, but the wolves all seemed to hear me because they all looked at Jacob confused, but he just shrugged.

Billy, however, didn't hear me and squinted at my face.

'You look like that girl he introduced me to – Daisy something or other, James' girlfriend.'

I was slightly annoyed by the fact that he didn't even remember my mum's name.

'Her _name_ was Lily, and I _should_ look like her – she's my Mum!'

'Oh.' Billy shifted uncomfortably in his wheelchair before changing the subject. 'So, where is Sirius nowadays? Still a bachelor?'

I frowned at him.

'When was the last time you contacted him?'

'Round about sixteen years ago, give or take a few months.'

'Sirius died.' I couldn't stop the tears when I said this. 'Just less than a year ago.'

'I'm sorry to hear that.' Billy's uncharacteristically gruff voice startled me. 'He went down fighting, I suppose?'

'Yeah. We were in a battle at the Ministry. We were all duelling in the Death Room. We didn't see... we didn't see that _bitch_ hit him until it was too late.' I wiped my tears from my face with the back of my hand.

'Anyways, I have to go... unless... you want me to deliver a message to Penelope?' I turned to leave, but then remembered the Clearwaters.

'You know Penny?' Harry asked.

'Yeah, we went to school together.'

'Penelope? As in _Cousin_ Penelope?' Leah interrupted.

'_Yes_, Leah. Keep _up_, will you?' Seth answered with a roll of his eyes.

'You go to the same prissy school as _Penelope_?' Leah added in a scowl for effect.

'Leah, be nice. It's not prissy, it's a private school.' Sue admonished.

'Actually, it's not _really_ a private school, it's just... very exclusive.' I should've kept my mouth shut.

'Really? That's not what my brother said. How exclusive is it?' Harry asked.

I had to think about this. 'They accept around 35 new students every year.'

'Like I said, _prissy_.' Leah muttered.

'It's not _prissy_. They pick students based on natural talent.' This was as close to the truth as I could get. 'A third of the students come in via the selection process, but generally, you'll be accepted if one or both of your parents went.'

'Did Penelope get in _via the selection process_?'

'Yes she did.'

'And what about you?'

'My parents both went there.'

'Charlie went to a _private_ school?' I almost jumped. I had forgotten about the wolves and Billy. 'He doesn't seem the type.' Jacob muttered.

'Charlie's not my father.' I was facing Jacob, but I couldn't bring myself to look into his eyes, so I focused on a point just over his shoulder.

'Well, anyways, I really have to be going now. So... bye.'

'Wait! What... where... how... how do I – I mean, _we_ contact you.' I didn't want Jacob to see me cry, so I directed my answer to the Clearwaters instead.

'Contact Penny. She'll know how to find me.'

And with that, I shut the door before the first of the wrenching sobs claimed my body.


End file.
